2009-05-25T03:36:00.000-07:00

I have so much anger & hatred towards my parents, the only thing i can think about relating to them is plotting my revenge. A few examples would be,

1: Visiting them only once a year (Hari Raya) when i'm married.
2: If they want to come visit, tell them i'm not home no matter what time it is.
3: If they tell me in advance they want to come next week/month, tell them i have plans made with my hubby.
4: If they decide on surprise visit, i'm not home.
5: If they say things like i'm always out with my hubby, i'll tell them that he owns me now & that we're only doing what we weren't allowed to last time, andddd that they can't stop me now!
6: If they tell me to come visit, i'll just let them know that my hubby doesn't allow me to, just like how they're not allowing me to go out now.

Don't worry, i think i won't be spending much time at home when i'm married anw. Everyday will be a dating day for me & hubby, as we are not allowed to do so now. I think ppl would tell me to be appreciative abt having parents but i bet even orphans, as much as they want parents, won't give anything in the world at all just to have mine.

I have the most ridiculous & unreasonable father who i think is too blind to see that his means and ways of upbringing his childrens has brought nothing but hatred towards him. My sisters label our house as 'House of Unhappiness', saying every thing abt this house is unhappy.

Sometimes i do not understand his ways of doing things. He is strict abt religious, but he doesn't do his part where it is concern. In comparison to my cousin, their late father is strict abt religious too, and i can see that his children grew up well. Apart from that, they love their parents and family and they're always thankful to have their parents as their parents and they blog abt nth but happy posts all the time. See, i guess ppl can be religious-strict yet happy at the same time, so how come we have to be miserable and i don't know where our religious went to.. It is sad, really...

angst